Go Back

“I was first struck by the absence of time, having depended on it so completely as a measure of myself and my life.

Moving backwards into the perpetual night – it consumes purpose, indeed, all passion and will.

I come to you, old friend, with the dull clarity of the dead, not to beckon, you but to feel the fire and intensity that still live in you… and the heavy weight of your burdens which I had once borne.

There is truth you know, friend, if that’s all you seek, but there’s no justice or judgment, without which truth is a vast… dead… hollow.

Go back.

Do not look into the abyss or let the abyss look into you; awaken the sleep of reason and fight the monsters within and without.”

The Secret to Happiness

Maybe the secret to happiness is to allow oneself to be different from everyone else.

To have different ideals, values and definitions of success.

To have a unique style and taste.

Not to care for the sort of critique that seeks to define, catalogue or diminish our feelings, dreams, preferences or style.

To love and respect by default, expecting nothing in return.

To know oneself.

A basic yet strangely often needed reminder that we can be happy being ourselves, on the path we are to know ourselves.

Thank You, Danke, Merci, Gracias, Arigatou Gozaimasu


St John’s, one of the locations to visit…

A big THANK YOU to all twitterers and wordpress…ers(?) that clicked to vote for my entry on the Financial Times competition, we made it into the Top Ten! To vote, only a click in their website is needed, no details of any kind required-> http://myftweekend.ft.com/entries/aOrMrI

While my main aim was really to showcase my writing skills, I can’t deny that I am wishing (Bambi-eyes, hands-in-prayer) for an all-expenses-paid trip to the north of Canada. Way up north… by the North Pole to be exact. I’d like to visit that “shipping involved” area before predictions take and shipping becomes and all-year-round activity, changing the culture and environment of that area by 2060. The sky is the limit on what I would derive from such a trip! Articles to publish with shipping research and predictions; job market predictions well out there (I’m in the UK); the culture, trends and food; landscape and city photography and so much more.

If you would like to know a bit more about what I am referring to in terms of “shipping predictions”, run an online search for “north pole shipping predictions”. *

So far, the top entry in the competition is looking very promising, with a ‘free-weekend wish” well in line _very much parallel_ to what the Financial Times publishes.

Nonetheless, it’s been real! I have now plenty of ideas for marvelous things to do on weekends and there is still time to get your vote in at: http://myftweekend.ft.com/entries/aOrMrI

The comp ends on Halloween 31 October, and the panel will choose one winner out of the Top Ten entries.

* Here’s a couple of quick links for your information in case you’re interested in what is going on in the Arctic: http://www.wired.co.uk/news/archive/2013-03/05/trans-arctic-shipping-routes-opening-warming

St. John’s, Newfoundland (Canada) Image source.

Masonic Temple, Liverpool St., London


Colossal columns and slabs of marble, each piece as complex and absorbing as nature itself. The dark mahogany furniture, doors and flooring are as imposing to the eye as they are reassuring to the touch. Every element in this time capsule appears to have been forthrightly built to outlast time. How, is not clear.

The Masonic Temple at the Andaz Liverpool Street Hotel in London is an impossible statement against the inevitable. Its chiselled wisdom betrays ambition, extravagance and opulence, despite an attempt to conceal them under austere colours and low lighting.

Order, truth, trust and wisdom are also conceptualised, however, the room fails to testify to the order’s belief that in passing, man has and is what he did, experienced and offered. Nothing else.

It clings onto material existence as if fearing to lose or let go of its richness and sensory pleasures.

MTStaircaseFrom the ground floor, an icy marble staircase leads to the antechamber of the Masonic Temple. The soft cushioning of the carpet and the vast white marble veranda impress, as a walk among clouds would, on a path to a castle in the sky.
Why ostentatiously decorate this room with heavy and persisting materials if it is housed inside a building structurally weaker in comparison?
MTDoorsI couldn’t help imagining the crumbling building, burying with it the heavily clad room. A castle in the sky.

The antechamber plays intriguingly with harmonic proportions and base materials. The heavy doors to the temple pivot, light as feathers, on an unseen, weighted mechanism. They are the only reference to fluidity I could find and the only aspect of the masonic expertise I could experience in the time we were given to visit the location.

I’m not clued up enough to say this post is anything other than personal experience. I can share however my impressions and a few more pics at: https://www.flickr.com/amavergara/ Including one of the second grand chair presiding the room.

If you know of reading that would help in finding out more about the location please do feel free to share in the comments.

Thanks for reading, subscribing and hopefully liking this post,


Time is not an issue for ‘Fine Bouche’

As personal blogs go this one isn’t toning down the egocentrism and as such, today’s post is all about me. Or at least all about something I like. I think I’ve already babbled about my first degree in Graphic Design and my appreciation for genius creative ideas. This post celebrates one of those happy miracles giving seasoned designers a reason to live.


The hard-back book in the video and pictures is a second-hand marvel. The happy produce of design mating with time. The cover is made of fabric, a finely weaved tinted fabric. It was initially meant to be purple from head to toe, just like the pages, but something happened with time. A daily dose of Sun and Moon light weakened the fabric’s tincture around the edges and spine of the book, producing a perfectly graded shift from purple to light pink. Some of the purple held onto the fabric’s weave adding metallic sprinkles among the pink. The effect is so beautiful to look at the digital camera had trouble capturing it.

The gilded serif lettering complements the sprinkles and pink-to-purple transition.


If a designer had wanted to achieve the same effect with bleach or other chemicals, the book would have looked as good with extreme difficulty and too much by way of investment.

A beautiful effect to appreciate.

The detail in the pages (colour, texture and the typeface effects) are also worth a close look.

Do you have any book covers you love? Care to share?

P.S: Sorry about the lame music in the video… does nothing for ‘Fine Bouche’s good taste.


Courage has always been a vital part of human life. Raw courage would have been a vital part of our ancertors’ lives as they survived illness, adverse weather and their environment on a steady diet of social ties, food and courage.

Modern life seems to want to obliterate courage by calling it risk. Nowadays, to have the courage to enjoy the basic freedom of speech is sometimes considered conflictive or mindless bravery.

Courage is not dwindling because humans are any more tyrannical and cruel than ever before. It is disappearing because of the self-complacency and laziness comfort bred in the first world. A fact that has happened before and will continue to occur.

From an individual’s perspective, to cleverly and tactfully enjoy courage is to fulfill a basic human life requirement. Particularly when an environment doesn’t fulfill us anymore.

This post ties in with my 31 July post on Tradition (such as education and beliefs) as a means to anchor us when undergoing a time of transition and change. That is, when invoking courage.


In a moment of inspiration I saw tradition in a different light, not as a set of rules with origins in the past and a credibility vouched for by others, but as a means of anchoring oneself during times of insecurity, uncertainty and change.

Tradition is the choice that can never go wrong, the petite veste noire de Chanel that noone regrets wearing.

Tradition is the choice that keeps us sane while we figure out beliefs, unprecedented experiences or loss.

We are safe to innovate and evolve when tradition is nearby. Tradition is the trunk that supports the branches and the systematic element we simply could not exist without.

MarmVlade™ Inc

I published the first version of this humour short story entitled ‘MarmVlade™ Inc.’via Amazon in December 2013 and as expected, the internet didn’t fail to surprise.

With a little more experience I am ready to dip more than my toe in the self-publishing world. Below is a description of what is now the final version of this story and further down are the links to the worldwide Amazon sites selling it.

A second eBook is in the making that will cruise these seas with greater resolve. Any feedback that you aged self-publishers have would be much appreciated.

‘MarmVlade’ is the flagship product of the obscurely named ‘MarmVlade™ Inc.’, a successful multinational whose business is sugar in all its forms (mostly refined). The company devises a marketing campaign to expand its customer base in competition with ‘Jams&Spreads™ Ltd.’; a rival company whose luck is proportional to the business acumen and savoir-faire of “MarmVlade’s” directorship and staff. Under a perpetual sugar rush, our protagonists deal with the side effects of customer loyalty and frenzied insulin to apparently not so great effect.

This humorous novelette (not even) was written in a screenplay format with no other moral objective than to entertain the author and her readers. Despite the humorous and surreal imagery, I do hope this début eBook will bring as much enjoyment to you, dear reader, as it did to me,

Yours digitally,
Alejandra M. A. Vergara

For Amazon.com

For Amazon.co.uk

For Amazon.de

For Amazon.fr

For Amazon.es

For Amazon.it

For Amazon.co.jp

For Amazon.com.br

For Amazon.ca

For Amazon.in

For Amazon.com.au

Free Will or Predeterminism?

fancy-freeI’ve placed my bet, I’ve made my choice.

The question is itself a testimony of free will. It exemplifies our ability to ask questions, examine choices, make decisions and take action; thereby making us accountable for the cause and effect of the choices we make.

In the absence of absolute proof that there is an omnipotent being who predetermined everything; in the absence of absolute proof that we are but an atom in the tight weave of an Unity that expands and regroups itself cyclically; and/or, in the absence of substantial reading to over complicate the topic, we can only go by what we can be certain of.

That is, that we are fully responsible for our actions and that whatever happens onto us only alters the choices we are able to make moving forward.

Choosing freewill over fatalism was liberating.

Fatalism seems to me to be a detached and far too comfortable approach to life. It’s almost the diabolus* of the non-believing mind. The logic onto which blame (own or otherwise) can be diverted in order to attain happiness.

Our capacity to use tools and lay blame elsewhere defines us… If only we could do so wisely.

*The ‘thrown across’.

Gloriously Emotive

the-trappistine-1897         I’m sitting at The Ivy (all expenses paid by a soul I love more than my own) waiting (for the aforementioned soul to finish gracing Westminster’s sewers) and reflecting on human emotions and where they’re at their most observable. I’ve read somewhere, probably Grazia or Vogue or such other vapid advert runway, that human urges are truly at their most observable in restaurants. At this particular one, demonstrable appetites seem to have entered a ‘no-go’ zone. The plates are adorned with something that looks nowhere as nourishing as the price tag implied, almost barely the sapped essence of what we ordered. To observe an urge here would be to witness the paranormal, acknowledge ghosts exist and could be desired by size zero’s. What is observable in restaurants, workplaces (and everywhere else you’re thinking of) isn’t ‘urges’ at their purest, it’s constant ‘authored restraint’: That is: *Disguised emotions that imply urges without disturbing the immediate vicinity with emotional sound-waves that could incur attentions other than the calculated ones.* With enough practice the Pantone swatch of expressions we use to display ‘moderation’ and ‘self-possession’ becomes easier to browse through and identify. Consciously or otherwise. Good Emotional Intelligence and Body Language courses beyond what you’ll find in mainstream catalogues will push you to identify what informs the gestures or expressions we ourselves choose to use. Having attended those courses, and knowing the theory and consequences, I still opt for unrestrained everything. I am not doing the moment or my sweet company justice by authoring emotions. I want my life to reflect me at my raw-est. The dubious minds among you, dear readers, will equate this to ‘wearing one’s heart up one’s sleeve’; an ‘easy target’, ‘asking for it’. To those, all I can say is: ‘Get your face off my elbow so I can put it back in my sleeve.’ Transparent emotions don’t make victims, they make walking curses of those that try to bruise their bearers. More importantly, they make fulfilling lives for those that enjoy experiencing them.


I’m back, it’s been a while since I last blogged my musings instead of only sharing them on weekend evenings with good company and good generous helpings of grape elixirs.

This post (you’ll be grateful to know) is not one of my musings but a blog update. What do you think of my artwork? It can be seen and commented on here: https://alejandraarroyo.wordpress.com/portfolio/

Psychology & Behavioural Economics

Nugget post:
My interest is growing for Psychology and Behavioural Economics. I have always been interested in Demographics but my background being Finance a crucial aspect was missing.

I was surprised by the revelation that, despite the enormity of both these subjects, what informs them and the people that theorise them, is the day-to-day thoughts and interactions we rarely acknowledge out loud.

Our inner thoughts influence all our interactions and decisions. Add all those countless interactions together, for each individual in any location, and you have an economy that thrives proportionally to how open it is to personal understanding.

Psychology: The Currency of Affection

Thought of the day, Sunday 24/11/2013. Like a soup but with words.
Most accept that someone’s affection can be bought with any such currencies as time, money, dieting or even a life.

The fact is that affection has freewill and that, inevitably, chaos ensues once any attempt is made at giving affection a value. A heart-rending truth is that once someone’s attention becomes overvalued, he or she will naturally not choose to deter others from giving away their time and money in return for it.

More wretched still is that faking affection for a price has now long become a fully fledged business model, following strong public demand.

This poignant documentary debates just that: is faking affection an acceptable business model? By return: is the celebrity culture any different?

The documentary leaves the door open to much more complex and involved debate around the age old question: is a business’ T&Cs fine print acceptable if it doesn’t require acknowledgement of the devastating implications of inflated attachment?

In Investment Finance, declaring risks is a big party pooper but one that financial regulators finally recognised as being crucial to maintaining healthy economies. Should the same be done to business models revolving around crucial life goals such as affection and self-worth?

EDIT: thanks for the tip :)! There is indeed a form to fill in! See:

Atheism aimed too high

This short “Thought of the Day” post presents a personal opinion on atheism and proposes opening a debate on the same. It is informed by personal experience resulting from an exploration of different faiths this past decade.

A Roman Catholic since I was a foetus, I rebelled by exploring spiritism, wicca, agnosticism and atheism in what I now know to be a search for the meaning of Life in the wrong place: others.

As a re-re-re-converted Roman Catholic version 4.1, I oftentimes reflect on past choices. Here’s a reflection on atheism.

Atheism aimed (what I think is a poorly constructed ideology) mostly against God and the hierarchy of the Church, lead by a Messiah. Atheism doesn’t exist as a faith in its own right but as an antagonistic belief that automatically opposes all divine, supernatural figures and their related rites. It also forgot that all organised society, and most of us in it, need role models and life advice. These are the reasons why I think atheism will never be valid to anyone beyond those seeking attention, social dissociation and recognition from self-appointed “analytical, down-to-earth minds” that curiously assume the same status and burdens that Church leaders have.

The trait that gives atheism away as a “rebellion without cause” is its failure to consider the great mysteries that are human conflict and context. Internal and environmental. Atheism failed to address the critical and humane needs to assert identity and answer existential questions. A topic that C. G. Jung explored in depth.

To live without wondering where everything originates from is to lead a half-life in my opinion.

Admittedly, it could be argued against the above that atheism does attempt to fill the existential void by turning to a divine figure that jealously guards all the answers to existence: science. A figure that will be channelled in due course by a saviour figure in lab robes and thick glasses.

I considered this (in more serious and unbiased terms) but it didn’t do much to amend my view of atheism’s purpose. Science to me is a tool, a methodology, nothing more.

Maybe this personal bias makes it difficult for me to accept (again) that there is any validity in the anthropocentric belief that is atheism. I’d need some reading or ideas on that and any reader’s feedback might help too : ). Please rate, comment, share much appreciated.

When Life gives you a shovel full of dirt…

I love this little story, almost out of Aesop’s tales…

A Lesson From a Donkey
One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbours to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer’s neighbours continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping. Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred – Forgive.
2. Free your mind from worries – Most never happens.
3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less from people and more from the world and environment that surrounds you. The Oneness we belong into is ever-loving and full of possibility.

“Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to use the imperfections.”